France etiquette and culture: dos, don'ts and local customs

Etiquette itself costs nothing, but the moments when it matters most line up with when you travel and what you book. The table below maps the practical side: who needs which entry step, when the country is busiest, and what a day of eating and moving around typically runs to.

The single most important habit is the greeting. Walk into a bakery, a pharmacy, a lift or a waiting room and say "bonjour" before anything else. Leave with "au revoir" or "bonne journée". Staff who seem cold are usually reacting to a customer who started with a question instead of a greeting, not to foreigners as such.

Use "vous" with strangers, shop staff, officials and anyone older; "tu" is for friends, family, children and peers who offer it first. "Madame" and "Monsieur" stand alone in shops and offices, without a surname. "Bonsoir" replaces "bonjour" from roughly early evening.

Handshakes are standard in business and between men; a light cheek kiss (la bise) is normal between friends and family, not with shopkeepers or new acquaintances. If someone offers a hand, take it. Keep physical distance a little wider than in the US or UK, and keep your voice down; loud conversation on a train or in a restaurant draws looks.

Meals are social and slow. Lunch can run two hours, and restaurants rarely rush you out. Kitchens often close between lunch and dinner, so a 16:00 meal is hard to find outside brasseries and cafés. Dinner at home or in a restaurant usually starts at 19:30 or later.

Keep both hands, or at least your wrists, above the table rather than in your lap. Bread goes on the tablecloth, not the plate, and is torn rather than cut. Don't start eating before your host says "bon appétit", and don't season a dish before tasting it, especially in a restaurant. Wine is poured for others before yourself.

Service is included by law, so a tip is optional. Round up the bill, or leave about 5–10% for good service. In cafés, prices differ between the counter (comptoir) and a terrace table, and the menu will show both. Ask for the bill ("l'addition") rather than waiting; staff won't bring it unprompted. Tap water is free if you ask for "une carafe d'eau".

French dressing is generally understated: neutral colours, few logos, smart-casual rather than sportswear in town. Beachwear and swimsuits belong at the beach or pool, not on the street or in shops. Restaurants and churches expect covered shoulders; some churches ask for head coverings.

Queues are respected but not always visibly formed; ask "c'est la file?" if unsure. On the metro, let passengers off before boarding and give up seats to older travellers and pregnant women. Smoking is banned indoors in public places, but pavement smoking is common.

Punctuality matters for business, dinner invitations and tours; arriving 10–15 minutes late to a friend's home is tolerated, but not to a meeting. Public holidays such as 14 July, 1 May and 15 August close many shops and offices; check before planning a day around a specific market or museum.

You don't need fluent French, but the attempt matters. Open with "bonjour", then "parlez-vous anglais?" rather than launching into English. Learn a handful of phrases: s'il vous plaît, merci, excusez-moi, l'addition, une carafe d'eau. In Paris, hotels and major museums usually have English-speaking staff; in villages and small shops, less so.

Common visitor mistakes: starting a conversation without a greeting; treating "tu" as universal; expecting shops to open on Sunday or in August; assuming the bill will be brought without asking; and tipping 20% as at home. None of these will ruin a trip, but fixing them changes how you are treated.

Two rules have real cost consequences. Sunday and August closures mean you should plan market visits, small-town restaurant meals and bakery runs around them, especially in rural areas. And the counter-versus-terrace price gap in cafés can double the cost of a coffee, so decide before you sit down.

For families, restaurants are generally welcoming to children, but high chairs and kids' menus are less common than in the US; a lunch service is easier than a late dinner. For drivers, the greeting habit carries into petrol stations and toll booths, and a quick "bonjour" smooths most interactions. If you are staying longer than a holiday, the same social rules apply at work: greet colleagues in the morning, use "vous" until invited otherwise, and keep lunch a real break rather than a desk meal.